holy shitballs

The chain of events.

Night shift has been a trip. I love the people i work with and love the work environment. Night shift makes you so autonomous. You must make decisions without the help of a million member team. The day supervisors, workers, cafeteria people, janitors etc are all at home tucked into their beds. We must work independantly and make calls based on the doctors advice. I love it!!! The doctors i work with are young, fresh and so approachable. They allow me to offer suggestions and respectfully discuss them with me. I feel truly invigorated at work. What a gift!

I had an interesting night the other night...let me summarize :)

#1 "i have a bug in my ear!, I know its in there, I can feel it and hear it! Please help me!!!!!!!!!!!!" Doc investigates and pulls out lots and lots of ear wax. I figured that's all it was in there but then I see the doc digging a little deeper. He asks me to get the forceps and I begin to wonder.....He slowly pulls out what I was dreading all along......a BUG! ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww. I seriously was grossed out. The patient's mom screams  " what the hell is that?" What do I say to that lol? So we show her. I think all of us in the room were trying very hard to stay cool but when I saw those pinchers on that sucker. I about barfed. Anyways...bug came out, end of story :)

#2 Walked into the shift to the sound of the ambulance at the bay. CODE BLUE was called. Man hadn't been breathing for over 10 minutes. He had a large device strapped to his chest that pumps his heart for him. Very barbaric but very reliable. My mentor and I jumped into action. The code team ran to the room and all began with protocol.He had not had a heart beat for quite some time so he was looking rough. I began to feel the weight of the situation. I did all I could to assist but the situation was growing grim. After some time the doctor pronounced him expired and the room cleared out. I stood there a minute and truly tried to grasp what had just happened. One minute alive. The next dead. We gently closed his eyes and a watched from a distance as the doc told the man's wife the news. How people respond are so different. She just nodded quietly and said she had to tell the family. My heart ached. Over the next several hours different family members kept pouring in to say their good byes. Some screamed, some wept but all felt the effects of the death. Including myself.

#3 Last patient of the night. Woman came in with her family. She had been having trouble breathing for a few hours. She looked sick. We ran tests, gave meds, and ran some more tests. She was slowly deteriorating. I sensed she was going downhill. At one point I ran to the pharmacy to get some meds that weren't readily available because I felt the urgency. The doc and I were in the room going over some things when the cardiac rhythm on the monitor began fluctating wildly. Something was going on. Her heart was switching patterns every few minutes and we were analyzing as quickly as we could. Then......her heart stopped. The doc jumped onto her chest and began CPR, we called a code blue (again) and the full production began. I am a new nurse and codes are not common to me at all so I knew I had to record all procedures and meds given so we had an accurate record but everything was happening so fast! I was scribbling on every and any thing i could find. The nurse administrator came into the room and gave me the correct sheet and and guided me as to how to record the event. I was responsible for calling out when new meds were ready to be given and the time frame that the code had been going on for. After 45 minutes of blood (literally), sweat and tears the doc had to stop it. There was nothing else we could. We did everything for her. She was too sick. God it was awful. She was TALKING to me an hour before. The responsiblility of bagging the body was given to me. I didn't want it but knew I had to learn eventually. I cleaned her up, removed some tubes and wrapped her in a plastic sheet. I kept waiting for her to sit up, grab my arm or gasp. She didn't. I bound her feet and arms and put a toe tag on her. A toe tag....just like the movies. I wheeled her to the morgue and placed her in the fridge. Jesus...that was so terrifying. It blows my mind to think you could be alive one minute and locked in a fridge the next. Creepy is an understatement.

Well, as you can tell I had a day. Of course I had many more patients but 2 deaths in one day kind of overrules everything else.
I love my job, and although it sounds sad or depressing it truly isn't. It teaches you to appreciate what you have, health and the miracle of waking up everyday.

Here's to many more miracles........ :)